31. Death is not the greatest loss in life. The greatest loss is what dies inside us while we live’

Death is not the greatest loss in life. The greatest loss is what dies inside us while we live’

What makes us human? Is it the flesh, bones, heart and brain? Perhaps none of it; It’s our conscience the accumulated sum total of our experiences, our emotions, our abilities and our vulnerabilities. It binds us to the world, makes us believe humans matter and above all is the driver of all proactivity.

But very often few conscience shattering experiences create sociopaths, the brains without emotions. The degree of numbness is immense. There is no pain, no compassion, no solace and no succour, and neither any feeling of joy nor aspiration for it. This isn’t nirvana either, as nirvana is achieved by and for the human soul; whereas sociopaths have no soul left to achieve
nirvana for.

Humanity has been sustained and maintained by these mutual bondages and individual aspirations. Loss of these values would make anyone an outcast in a society. This level of awareness and compassion is what separates man from other animals. Unlike animals, humans don’t have to depend on instincts (though they have them). Humans are an innovative species not just because we won the race of natural selection out of sheer luck, but our consciousness helped us win the race.

When this ability to feel, reason and be associated is lost, we lose the humane portion of our existence. We survive, but the reason why we exist is lost. The sheer volume of data resting in our heads becomes meaningless with the software processing that data gone forever. Even heretics pained by world look for solace, but when you lose your soul there’s neither need nor a will to look for solace. It isn’t despair either as for that you would need hope. It’s an inner world of utter sheer emptiness, an unfathomable void which can’t be filled.

Be it Buddha or Gandhi, all have emphasized on compassion, and found it integral to our soul. The means to salvation according to them was to behave humanely, be in touch with human elements. But once we let go of the human values, we lose all sense of morality and obligation. The institutions constructed for pushing these values (religion, government, family, and society) seem redundant and often ridiculous. The detachment can make us undermine humans and sometimes even render them insignificant. The HOC prayer of Frank Underwood sums it best –
“There’s no solace above or below; only us, small, solitary, striving, battling one another. I pray to myself for myself.”

It’s not all horrible being a sociopath; the loss of emotions and worldly bondages makes us more efficient. The stone cold choices made are more rational than ever. There’s no fear of consequence, or any fear of any sort holding us back. It’s neither love, nor obscure social bondage of patriotic duties that can move us or restrict us. We may not be able to appreciate art be it Picasso, Raphael or Van Gogh or a 4 year old kid, but isn’t the whole point of arts is to not be condescending and judgemental. We may not be able to hold our new born kid and feel the sparkle in its eyes; but isn’t this sort of selfish nepotistic relations cause of all sort of feuds and malaise in present society.

The perception that being a sociopath makes us an insane robot is also flawed, for sanity and robotics are both concepts made by mortal humans and not the eternal souls. Being human has its inherent advantages and disadvantages. Sociopaths just don’t share these advantages/ disadvantages.

Not being able to feel any pain is the best blessing humans can ask for but the blessing comes at the cost of not being able to feel joy either. Probably being able to feel, desire and aspire is what makes us humans, makes us more than a tangible entity. The feeling of belonging keeps us together. The aspirations keep us innovative and fear and caution protect us. These psychological and biological links are intertwined and make a human, humane. Death is a loss to a society, but death of humanness is the loss to individual, and an immeasurable one.